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Speaker 1

00:00

-♪ ♪ -♪ ♪ As this is our final episode of the year, we wanted to thank you so much for watching. We had a lot of fun, despite, you know, the world. We started a crisis pregnancy center. We had Wilma Valderrama in a bird suit.

Speaker 1

00:17

We wrote a book about Mike Pence's rabbit, and you bought it. You bought it a lot. Raising a huge amount of money for the Trevor Project and Age United. Thank you so much for doing that.

Speaker 1

00:28

We did an episode on Xi Jinping that got HBO's website temporarily blocked in China. Whoops. We talked to Anita Hill about her experiences in a depressingly prescient interview, and we put gritty on our dog Supreme Court. But, but a quick update about my personal favorite moment from this year, Because by now, you probably know that we sometimes like to buy stupid things.

Speaker 1

00:50

For instance, last year, we bought 5 wax presidents. Carter, Nixon, Harding, Clinton, and Harrison. And we made a movie about the life of Warren G. Harding with Laura Linney.

Speaker 1

01:01

We actually promised you that we would try and find a way to use the rest of the presidents, but we never properly got around to it. Well, this year, we bought something even dumber. Because when Russell Crowe held his divorce auction, we bought a bunch of his memorabilia, including his jockstrap from the 2005 film Cinderella Man, which we then donated to 1 of the last blockbusters in Alaska. And to his immense credit, Russell Crowe used the money that we paid to fund the John Oliver Koala Chlamydia Awards at the Australia Zoo.

Speaker 1

01:31

Which is... That is a burn so harsh that only koalas with chlamydia can sympathize. It was a truly life-affirming sequence of events. Although, I'm sorry to say that I do have a sad update on the Alaskan blockbuster part of that story.

Speaker 2

01:48

Alaska's last 2 blockbuster video stores are calling it quits. John Oliver tried to draw a little attention to these stores to save them. He gave them a leather jockstrap that Russell Crowe wore in the movie Cinderella Man.

Speaker 2

02:00

That would call attention to... Sure. Incredibly, that did not help.

Speaker 1

02:06

Well, first, fuck you. Just a little bit. Just a little bit.

Speaker 1

02:10

But, you know, it is very sad. Although, I will be honest, I didn't really expect the jockstrap to save blockbuster completely. As amazing as Russell Crowe's leather scrotum holster is, I didn't really think it had the power to make Netflix disappear. Now, if you are wondering what happened to all of Russell Crowe's merchandise, I have good news and bad news.

Speaker 1

02:28

The good news is, There's actually 1 remaining blockbuster in America. It's in Oregon, and all the items were sent there. The bad news is, 1 of them went missing. And tragically, it was the jockstrap.

Speaker 1

02:43

There were actually numerous stories about its disappearance. And I am sorry to tell you that we have no idea where Russell Crowe's jockstrap is. We don't. We simply don't.

Speaker 1

02:54

Except for the fact that we actually do. In fact, not only Do we know where that jockstrap is? We asked ourselves, what would be the single dumbest possible way to pay tribute to the most wonderfully stupid thing that happened this year? And the answer, we hope you will agree, was this.

Speaker 2

03:15

All right, listen up. We've robbed banks, museums, casinos, but this, this is the big 1. The greatest heist of all time.

Speaker 2

03:29

We're gonna steal Russell Crowe's jockstrap from the 2005 film Cinderella Man.

Speaker 1

03:40

♪

Speaker 2

03:44

Aah!

Speaker 1

03:50

♪

Speaker 2

04:03

This won't be easy. That's why I've hired the best of the best. Tricky Dick, the best damn explosives man in New York City.

Speaker 2

04:15

Jimmy C. Notes, Mr. Fix-It himself, There's no ride he can't chop.

Speaker 1

04:20

-♪♪

Speaker 2

04:22

Willie Pneumonia. Sick man with a sick rap sheet.

Speaker 1

04:27

-♪♪

Speaker 2

04:30

And Billy Wheels. The man with the master...

Speaker 1

04:34

-♪♪

Speaker 2

04:40

Actually, I'm not really sure what he does And of course our ringleader the og himself G-dog Like I said, this won't be easy. This could get messy. They're gonna throw everything they got at us.

Speaker 2

05:18

You ready to do this? Buckle up, motherfuckers. This guy's are everywhere. Cover me.

Speaker 2

05:47

Where the hell did that come from?

Speaker 1

06:00

♪♪ ♪♪ -♪♪ -♪♪ -♪♪ -♪♪

Speaker 2

06:33

That's how it's done!

Speaker 1

06:34

-♪♪

Speaker 2

06:34

That's how it's done! Warning, security breach. You think this is over?

Speaker 2

06:48

We have the strap. Don't you let that jockstrap get away, G-Dog. Stay on him, stay on him!

Speaker 1

07:00

♪♪ ♪♪

Speaker 2

07:14

Who the hell do these guys work for?

Speaker 1

07:16

♪♪ Hello, my pretty.

Speaker 2

07:24

I've missed you.

Speaker 1

07:28

Welcome home. ♪♪ -♪♪

Speaker 2

07:32

you